In no time true love would be banging down my door and looking to move in

Surely my eyes are deceiving me

There I was all excited looking at all these beautiful women and their profiles. It was so easy, you just send a little flirt here, a little flirt there.

I eventually began talking to a very fine looking young lady from the city. We spent several nights emailing back and forth and having lighthearted chats about life and current affairs. Simple. We eventually exchanged phone numbers and then began texting.

A couple of weeks had past and we decided to meet! We arranged to meet at a restaurant in the city and then head for a few drinks. Here it comes.

I make my way to the city after trying to decide what to wear for 4 days. I arrive on time and she is already at the table waiting.

About half way through the dinner and after her order of another glass of wine I ask myself… “is she slurring her words?” a bit more conversation and yes its confirmed, she is definitely slurring her words.

Oh dear, but I think well maybe she is a little nervous meeting and needed some dutch courage. Dinner finally over, we head to the bar.

TRUE LOVE!

Once there, I ask her would she like a drink or få en Kinesiska brud a glass of water perhaps. She opts for the drink.

We sit down across from each other and we are still chatting. Suddenly its her round!! She jumps up asks what I am drinking and then heads to the bar. Another drink consumed. At his point there is no mistake she is definitely slurring her words. I excuse myself and head to the bar to get a large glass of water and bring it back to her, I am thinking its the polite thing to do. I hand her the water to which she drinks best part of it. She places the glass down on the table quite methodically, suddenly jumps up and lunges at me, I need to say here that I am now slightly pinned to the chair, bother her hands are on either side of the chair, she thrust her face into mine and her tongue quickly follows, for a few split seconds I am almost in shock. I push her away to which she falls back into her own chair and wild eyed looks at me and says,…..’Don’t you like me’?

My reply is simple I tell her that I don’t really know her. She jumps up and then heads to the bar again. I begin to think that it is probably time to wrap the evening up. I suddenly recall a conversation that I had had with a friend a few days before going on the date.

“What if she doesn’t like me, what if I don’t like her, what do I do?” Friends advice, just be polite and don’t go off and try meet anyone else. Say your good-nights and leave it at that.I think solid advice, right?

That is what I will do, I will wrap up the evening and say goodnight. She returns from the bar with drinks in hand, “right”, I say to myself, “drink this and then make your excuses to get going” once again another lunge! I am now completely bewildered. I excuse myself to the bathroom and in the mirror I tell myself its time to call it a night.

Upon my return from the toilet I am almost in shock. It just can’t be…… There she is…… my date, wrapped around someone else. Tongues and all! I think “yep it is now time to call it a night”.